20 mindfulness activities

We can (and should) practice being mindful every day. It's not always easy to start with, especially if you're stressed, but that is why you should! Here is a list of activities that you can try being mindful with. Fully concentrate on the task, letting any negative thoughts float away.

Some things to keep in mind or concentrate on while doing these tasks..

• The small details that you may have otherwise missed 
• The smells, textures or tastes around 
• any judgements that you think of while doing the activity. 

So let's get started with the list! (try something new from it)

1. Colouring in (there are plenty of adult colour books around now
2. Yoga
3. Walking in the countryside
4. Taking a bubble bath (too really focus on your senses, treat yourself to a nice bath bomb!)
5. Doing puzzles (crosswords, arrow words, jigsaw)
6. Learning about something that interests you 
7. Reading 
8. Drawing / doodling 
9. Breathing exercises 
10. Mediation
11. eating
12. Being mindful when strong emotions arise. where do you feel them? Is there any physical changes in your body?
13. Listening to music 
14. Watching a film
15. Walking the dog
16. Baking 
17. Write a novel 
18. Write a poem
19. Follow a tutorial or craft video
20. make or create something

Basically you can do most things mindfully! Give it a try today!

DBT skill - Radical Acceptance.

Sorry I haven't posted at all this year. I've been finding it difficult to master the strength to write blog posts. I'm currently in a difficult emotional state so I thought writing this post may help. 

Radical acceptance is one of the most useful and also the most difficult skill (I personally think) to master within DBT. 

So what is radical acceptance? 

This skill is designed to help stop your emotional suffering at a time when a situation cannot be changed. Many of us have unhelpful coping techniques that we may use to ignore the situation, for example self harm, drugs or alcohol. While these coping tools help us feel better in the short term, the long term damage to our bodies and mind can be devastating. Radical acceptance is about accepting the current situation or emotion, without fighting against it.

How does it help?

Accepting pain is the first step to feeling better, ignoring it only builds up the emotion leading to more pain in the future. Although it's very difficult to accept our pain, its a big part of life that we must come to terms with. 

How to radically accept 

• Acknowledge that pain is normal and won't last forever. 
• Allow yourself to really feel where the emotion is in your body. 
• Notice if you have thoughts to fight against the emotion ('I shouldn't feel this way' 'Its not fair')
• Remember that fighting against it will only make it worse in the long run. 

This skill comes under the model 'Distress tolerance' 

Keep practicing your skills! It gets better, believe me. 

Becky x 

Psychology & mental illness myths. - BUSTED.

A lot of the sigma around mental illness comes from myths and misconceptions about it that have been around for a while. I started looking into it and found some really interest psychology facts as well that I thought I'd share.

Myth- Adults don't grow any new neurons 

Truth - We do grow them, especially in the hippocampus, which is responsible for memory forming and emotional responses. 

Myth- Alcohol kills brain cells. 

Truth - It may not 'kill' the cells by excessive drinking may cause damage to the portals that send signals to the brain. 

Myth- Its better to express anger than hold in it. 

Truth- This is something I learnt about during therapy but have also read about in psychology books.  Expressing your anger can actually feed into it and make the aggression worse. I've learnt that dealing with the sadness that often comes with anger is more effective in the long term. 

Myth- We only use 10% of our brain.

Truth - People love the idea that we don't know how to use our brain to its full capacity, just imagine what we could do! But that's simply not the truth. 20% of our energy is used on brain power, and if we used more energy than then, it was simply be difficult or impossible to do anything else but think! 

Myth - You can tell if someone has an eating disorder by looking at them.

Truth- People with eating disorders come in all shapes and sizes. Eating disorders such as bulimia, binge eating and even anorexia can look normal in size. 

Myth- Eating disorders only affect women.
Truth-anyone can be affected by eating disorders, regardless of their gender.

Myth- The media is to blame for eating disorders.
Truth- There are numerous reasons why eating disorders can form, from a traumatic childhood, to genetics or simply a combination of multiple factors. The media may effect some peoples views on their bodies but eating disorders themselves are usually the result of many other reasons.

Myth- Self harm is a suicide attempt.
Truth - Self harm is coping mechanism for dealing with extreme emotions. In some cases, self harm prevents the person from actually attempting suicide.

Myth- There is no cure for mental illness.
Truth - This couldn't be further from the truth, there are many different forms of treatment for every mental illness, from medication to therapies, its about finding the right way to treat it for you.

If you want to learn more about mental illnesses and the common myths, check out the Mind website for a whole bunch of interesting information and advice. And remember that not everything you hear is true!

Becky x

Common thinking errors.

Black or white: This is similar to the all or nothing thinking. For example ‘I failed my driving test, Im a horrible driver and should give up.’

Over-generalization: One unfortunate event leads to the assumption that it will happen every time.

Mental filter: Picking out and dwelling on negative details.

Disqualifying the positive: Successes are seen as flukes.

Catastrophizing:  exaggerating your own imperfections

Emotional reasoning: taking feelings as facts. For example ‘I feel fat, therefore I am fat.’

Personalization: Blaming everything on yourself. 

Assertive listening. - Interpersonal effectiveness.

What is it? 

Assertive listening means to mindfully listen to another persons needs, wants and feelings. It is an important skill to have for a healthy relationship, and to ensure that the other person feels that you genuinely  care about what they are saying. 

Questions to ask to help you understand how they feel:
‘What’s the central problem as you understand it?’

·         ‘How do you make sense of the situation?’

·         ‘When you’re struggling with (name the problem), how does it make you feel?’

·         ‘What do you think needs to change?’

·         ‘What would you like me to do to help with this?’

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Blocks to listening:

·         Mind reading – Assuming you know what the other person thinks without asking. It is also assuming that they know how you are feeling.

·         Rehearsing – Thinking what you are going to say while the other person is talking, meaning you miss what is being said.

·         Filtering – Listening only to things that are important to you and missing the rest which is important to them .

·         Judging – Judging what they say instead of trying to understand how they see the situation

·         Daydreaming –Letting your mind wonder while they talk.

·         Advising – Looking for suggestions and solutions instead of listening and understanding.

·         Sparring – Invaliding the other person by arguing.

·         Being right – Resisting any communication  that suggests you are wrong and should change.

·         Derailing – Flat out changing the subject when something bothers you.

·         Placating – Agreeing too quickly (I know..your right…im sorry) without listening first. 

How to listen assertively:

   Prepare to be mindful when the other person talks.

·         While they speak, set aside your thoughts, needs and opinions.

·         Put yourself in their shoes and really imagine how they feel.

·         Feed back to them what you understand. For example ‘Things at work have been busy, so you feel stressed?’ Rephrase what they have said and repeat it back. 

Distress Tolerance - distracting from your thoughts.

Our thoughts are almost impossible to control and can be difficult to handle. Sometimes the best thing to do is to distract yourself, and your thoughts for the time being. Below are some examples of useful distractions when your thoughts are bugging you.

Distracting yourself by paying attention to someone else (Take the focus of you)

• Do something for someone else, like ask if your parents need any help with anything. Call someone and ask to take them for lunch. By a homeless person a cup of tea. Plan ahead and volunteer at a shelter for something you believe in.
• Take a attention of yourself by watching people. Go to the shops, café or library and notice things about people. How many people have blonde hair? Notice their dress sense, what they might do for a living or are they a student? Create stories for these people.
• Think of someone you love or admire and keep a photo of them in your purse.
• Plan ahead for a future birthday of a loved one. What presents can you get them? Could you take them somewhere nice?
• Make something for someone. A cake, card, maybe even sew something.

Distracting from your thoughts 

Sometimes when you really don’t want to think about something, it is all we can think about! So instead of trying to force yourself to get rid of these thoughts, it can be more useful to distract them. These tips are great for when you are out and about and can be done mostly anywhere. For example:

• Remember past events when you were happy. Where were you? Who were you with? Try to remember every detail, no matter how small. Write this memory down as you relive it.
• Imagine your fantasy future coming true. What would it consist of? Where would you live, what does your house look like? What are your kids like?
• Write down your favourite quotes and carry them with you
• Think of what you would say to someone in the past that has hurt you. Imagine being able to say anything to anyone. What would you say?

Distracting yourself with tasks and chores.

• Washing up
• House work
• Phone someone you haven’t spoken to in a while
• Organise
• Dye or cut your hair
• Polish your jewellery
• Throw away old clothes
• Sort of your finances
• Plan your career.

Make your own distraction plan using the activities above and also including your hobbies like reading/watching a film / shopping ect.

This is a photo of my sketchbook that I use when I'm in need of a distraction! Here I've painted a dream I had.